R. Kelly’s Publicist Must Hate Him. Has to…

Screen Shot 2014-01-03 at 4.14.48 PMSo… I am convinced that R. Kelly’s publicist secretly hates him and is masterminding his downfall. First, that completely illogical #askrkelly hashtag last week that basically just gave bored at work people a reason to go-all-the-way in for jokes. And now this radio interview… sorta.

Village Voice runs basically a “Death to R. Kelly’s Career” story which we all read. And his crazy PR sends him into a radio interview with Big Tigger in Atlanta the SAME DAMN DAY.

But get this: Tig– who I like– basically blows what could have been a Wendy-Whitney career-defining interview by lobbing soft ball questions.

Tig calls the VV story ”not so complimentary”—really? That’s all it was?  Calls the accusations “a period that’s behind you” and asks what Kelly thinks of the VV story.

Um. It ain’t behind you if the VV is running a story that morning, but…

Anyway, Kellz answers the Q with football metaphors and says, “When you get on top, its very windy.”

WTF?

He says “naysayers” and “detractors” or people with something to say can listen to the last song on his album, which is conveniently titled “Shut Up”.

Tig is practically a fanboy in the studio. It doesn’t go forgotten he dropped a verse on R. Kelly’s “Snake” way, way, way back when people still drank Hpnotiq.

Oh, and Kellz makes some jokes about his “tongue being tired” and how much he loves “cookies.”

Yuck. 

Some lady calls in to the station and she sounds like she’s practically coming on herself to be on the phone with Kellz. She literally starts squaaling like a teenage girl over One Direction. She squealed more for Kellz than she did for winning a $250 gas card.

Oh. Again. There’s another R. Kelly album coming in six months.

Where the **** is Charlamagne or Ebro and Rosenberg or hell, Toure’ again, when you need them?  **** bring back Wendy!!!!

 

I’d like the next interview– since there will be one as his publicist either hates him or is clueless– to include the following questions:

*Did you have sex with girls who at the time of the sex were not old enough to consent?

*Do you currently have sex with girls who at the time of the sex were not old enough to consent?

*Why do you think dozens of girls have accused you of having sex with them when they were in their early teens?

*What amount of money would you guess you have spent settling lawsuits to the family’s of young girls who accused you of statutory rape?

*If an artist was alleged to have done to your daughters what you have been accused of doing by dozens of young black girls, would you encourage women to buy his music?

*Do you still hang out at the Motown McDonald’s to meet high school age women?

*Are you dating anyone now? Is she legal?

*How old is the girl who is sitting on your lap on the album cover?

*Do you think it is appropriate to have a woman who looks so young on your album cover given the multiple allegations against you of having sex with underage girls.

*Do you prey on young Black girls?

*When you sing about sex, how old are the women you are singing to?

IJS.

 

Anyway, the complete interview if you’re curious:

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This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. This is so funny! I think his publicist is secretly trying to increase her billable hours. The more flack he gets, the more they have to come in and fix his problems and if you’re dealing with the fall out from the recession, then they’re definitely trying to earn some extra dough. Kudos to them!!

    On a serious note, as disgusting as the whole R. Kelly fiasco has been, I can’t deny that he’s talented. It’s just a shame he has to go down this road and why is he provoking the masses by continuing to write the songs he does…he may as well do like O.J. Simpson and write a book: “If I would have done it . . .” ughhh

  2. 161nt113 says:

    Great article. Good work !!!

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